What is Most Important this Christmas Season

I am afraid that many of us get so distracted with buying gifts for others and then thinking about what they will buy for us, that we do not take the time to consider what is it that we really and truly want. Nor do we allow ourselves to mull over what is most important to us this Christmas season. Sure, we all like nice presents but the happiness they bring us is very short lived and only surface deep.

Psychiatrists, psychologists and psychoanalysts have been asking countless clients and patients “What is most important this Christmas season” over a span of many years and the conclusion is always the same. What is most important at our gut level during the Christmas season is HAPPINESS, JOY, LOVE, FUN, PEACE, SERENITY, ACCEPTANCE, CONTENTMENT, FRIENDSHIP and COMPANIONSHIP as well as GOOD HEALTH. These are the intangible emotion words that drive us, these are the intangible emotion words that we crave and these are the intangible emotion words that we need.

It is such a paradox. We spend hours upon hours distressing over what to buy for whom and where to buy it, we fight traffic on the streets and crowds in shopping malls and then we wrap presents which are only mild distractions from what we honestly want. And the things that we honestly want do not ever require spending money, they cannot be gift wrapped even if we wanted to wrap them and there are no ribbons big enough to go around them. They are simple, they are basic and they are essentially crucial.

For a most memorable Christmas and the jolliest season, let us all concentrate more on the things that we all honestly want by fulfilling our intangible emotional words and less on the frills of the tangible. I realize that it may not be easy because there will be a few hurdles that we will have to overcome, but it is by no means impossible:

* Minimize Duty, Responsibility and Obligation. We may have lists upon long lists of things that we must do, should do and have to do, but forget to create lists of what we truly want to do. We cannot derive joy from doing things out of mere obligation.

* Give from Your Heart Not from Your Pocketbook. If you are going to give someone a gift, make it special not expensive.

* Give Yourself Credit for the Good You Have Done. It is honorable to give to worthwhile causes but do not beat yourself up if you cannot give to them all.

* Avoid Procrastinating. Do yourself a favor by making your Christmas plans way in advance and by starting to shop before the rest of humanity.

* If You Intend to Eat, Allow Yourself to Enjoy It. There is no point in eating if you are then going to feel guilty about it. It’s Christmas; relax and enjoy it.

* You and Yours Spouse Must Agree With Whose Family to Spend Christmas. To avoid family feuds and resentments, you and your spouse must be in total agreement about whether to spend Christmas with her family or with his, and such agreements must be established way in advance.

* Do Not Be Pressured to Drink More Than You Want To. Waking up with a hangover does not make good memories. If you are going to drink alcoholic beverages, do so only moderately and never drive after drinking.

* Do Not Be Afraid or Shy About Delegating. If you are the one who is hosting the Christmas dinner, encourage others to help you with the shopping, the preparations, the serving and the cleanup. You do not want to spend your Christmas being too tire and stressed to enjoy it.